Sunday, 18 August 2013

In the event of a zombie apocalypse...

Today I filled out a job application, for a job I'd really like to get, not only to help pay for things like rent and food but because it's an awesome job and something I'd really like to do.

The application was so difficult though, it launched me into one of those pesky existential crises that so dramatically effect French philosophers and teenagers, or people approaching new phases of their life. Anything that starts with "Outline a time when you..." or "Describe an occasion when you..." demands of you looking back and evaluating your actions. You start trying to analyse everything you've ever done so you can distill the experience down to 250 words and use it to convince a stranger that they should offer you employment.

I read Max Brooks World War Z recently and there is a portion of it set in post-armageddon LA where there are a whole bunch of big TV producers and stars being retrained in how to effectively clean a toilet. We also meet characters, a film director is one that stands out, who as society tries to rebuild itself are told they are unskilled useless people, essentially. They can move rubble and help dig graves but really aren't good for anything.

This led to the inevitable pondering of "What would I do if there was a zombie apocalypse/civilisation destroying event of your choosing?" Assuming I found a way to survive the initial onslaught by what could I do next? What skills could I add to the mix of humanity to make sure that we rebuilt ourselves?

That then led me to the inevitable epiphany of "Shit, never mind a zombie apocalypse, what can I do now? What assets do I have that I can use to benefit society or at least my bank balance?"

I've done a lot, I've lived abroad, I'm an ace public speaker, tell me to get something done and come hell or high water it will be done. But I lack direction and motivation to make my own decisions, I struggle when somebody asks me what I want to do because my own ambitions seem dreamy and unattainable. Also, you know the old thing of You can be ANYTHING you want, but you can't be EVERYTHING yeah, that shit pisses me off. Choosing to do something, I find, makes all the difference but without an end game in mind I flounder and when you can be anything you want, how can you possibly choose?

Well, that turned out heavier than I expected it to when I started...

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